Parents Who Shoot For Perfection With Their Teen Daughter Are Missing The Point
By: Angie Woodward
Trinity Teen Solutions is a Christian focused residential treatment center for troubled girls. We provide a nurturing and calming environment where girls who are struggling with bad behaviors are able to step back from their lives at home and focus on recovery. Through a combination of education, activities, counseling, group/family sessions and a personal relationship with God, our school provides a full spectrum of healing advantage. At Trinity Teen Solutions, every interaction with the girls in our care is a therapeutic chance that helps them build self-esteem, learn life altering skills and change their behaviors from the inside out. If you have a child who would benefit from this program, call 307-202-8400 for more information.
Parents who shoot for perfection with their teen daughter are missing the point. Nothing will push your daughter away faster than expecting perfection. Not only is it not possible but it prevents them from feeling safe about coming to you when they make poor choices. We all want our teens to feel comfortable in talking about their struggles and issues. So, when they do, parents need to be sure they stay calm and not make their teen feel bad for not being perfect. Sometimes teenagers will mess up, but parents can still strive to point them down the right path, guide them in making good choices and don’t expect them to shoot for perfection.
Setting Goals That Are Too High Can Lead To Failure
This does not mean your teen shouldn’t be disciplined or punished when she does wrong. There should be consequences for making poor choices. But then there are times when we have to be willing to extend leniency, especially if they are truly remorseful about something they have done. We should also remember that if we are imperfect, so are our teens.
Setting goals that are too high for the teen’s natural abilities or current skill set can lead to frustration and failure because expectations for teens should be achievable. Raising low expectations involves sharing exactly what behaviors are expected of the teenager and holding the teen accountable for those behaviors. By setting expectations that are reachable but push your teen’s limits, you will increase their chances of success.
Just like adults, some teenagers are more goal oriented than others. But, if you have a daughter who underperforms academically or has behavior problems, she may need therapeutic help. Please call Trinity Teen Solutions at 307-202-8400 to speak to our professional Admissions Director.